The Last Goodbye

Well. So. Hmm. How to start the saddest blog ever?

Buffy left London. Returned to T-dot. Which has devestated our family in many ways. I have no-one to watch Maury with. Fred has lost his best mate and now has no-one that gives him extra-long wizzies and then laughs with him as he drunkenly stumbles into the rose bushes. Dave... well... he's inconsolable of course. But we are slowly attempting to pull ourselves together and get on with life. Thankfully a wedding next year (Congrats K-Dawg!) might be the excuse that brings us together again.

Here are the photos of the last moments Fred has with his beloved Aunty Buff-Buff. And a tissue.

17 Blogs...

... is far too many for one harrased mother to run. It is unreasonable to expect that for every child, pet or new hat I might acquire over the coming years anew blog will be started. And for that reason, fred's blog shall now be known as fred and rocco's blog and be found at the following address:

http://www.fredandrocco.blogspot.com/


...as can some new rocco pics.

Rocco Coutts Ligertwood. Future Legend.

Apologies for not being the best photos in the world - but need to satiate the baying masses. (have not been behind the camera myself, so lesser photographers are to blame). Will put up a few more in the coming days.

The Ligertwood Boys

Rocco Coutts Ligertwood born 4am (London time) on 3.08.08. 8lb7oz, long dark hair, cross-eyed and squishy-faced. Labor was both eventful and pretty standard. Shorter than last time, more awesome pain-relief, but similar consequences which see me being a bit slower than I would have liked. BUT can't complain - healthy baby boy who seems very sweet at this time. Had very little sleep and trying to catch up on that. Hungry baby, milk not coming yet so very much have a baby attached to boobs at all time. Blah blah blah. Transferring photos onto Mr. Internet is something not immediately pressing but will hopefully get to do more in the next day or so.

Fred tentatively acknowledged Rocco, offering him a piece of dried fruiton their first meeting. But all hope of peaceful intergration was shattered when he watched Dave change the baby's nappy. For it was then we encountered the harrowing cries of a heart breaking. The bath he witnessed later that night saw Fred collapse on hte floor weeping at Dave's feet. Fred seems undisturbed by me holding Rocco, choosing to ignore us in favour of the bits of manky bread he stashes around the house. So not the best start, but pretty much as we expected it.

Will write up a more complete version of this past Saturday's events in good time as some things are too funny to not be aired in a public forum....

xxH

Carrot Cake. Bang!

My life has been reduced to taking pictures of what I cook.

The answer is....

No. Not yet.

I don't now why. Perhaps the ice cream induced extra padding is to blame. It must be comfy in there.

Perhaps Monday? Maybe Tuesday. I don't know.

Either way, I've did a refresher flick through my pregnancy book two days ago and I must say I'm not too worried about the delay. So many memories came flooding back and I am now terrified. TERRIFIED.. Absolutely panicing over the idea of childbirth and it's repercussions. I feel all shaky and weepy just thinking about it. Seriously. Last time I was all nonchalant thinking 'thousands of women do it every day, I'll be fine'. HAHAHAHA. Naieve, I was. It was not ok. It was not fine. It was an absoulte trauma. And at the first sign of a contraction I'm going to stip naked in the hospital waiting room and scream at them to shove a needle in my back. And if they don't do it, I'm going to eat them one by one until they do.

due to popular demand....

Disaster!!

OK. So I know that kids break things. It's all part of parenthood, right? My sister broke the television accidentally when a toddler, I broke her arm a few years later. Kids know not what they do. So i've always been prepared for Fred to wreck a few things, and that he has done. However today he broke my computer. And I almost cried. He pushed it off the table. It landed on the bit where the power cable connects to the computer, bent the attachment in half and when released little metal and blue plastic pieces showered out from the power cable socket. And looking at the way the computer is made, I'm pretty sure that whole chunks of the computer will need to be replaced in order to work again. Which probably means replacing the whole thing seeing as it will probably cost more than the 2-year old, not-particularly-expensive-in-the-first-place laptop is actually worth. ARGH. So I'm sitting on Dave's computer for 5 minutes to do this little entry, to warn y'all not to expect too much happening on here in the near future. My Internet time is going to be severely limited (maybe the scariest thought in the world, reduced only by the fact I'm facing childbirth in the next two weeks) depending on when I can get it fixed (at least 4 week turn around) or replaced (Christmas present if I play my cards right). BUT rest assured I promise to definitely post new baby pics as soon as I drag my bruised and battered body home from the hospital.

On the upside, as the problem with the computer is simply an inability to give it power, I had half an hour of battery time before it blinked shut. And in this time I madly raced to transfer all my photos from the computer hard drive to an external drive - something I achieved with one minute to spare and I am so so so so grateful for as I would probably still be crying down the phone to Dave, four hours later.

And on an aside - a positive one at that - my parents arrive early, early tomorrow morning, hopefully bringing with them the mobility and energy I lost months ago. Mmmm... being looked after by mum.... *bliss*

blogging the good blog

well, i have been tempted to drop the ball here a little bit, using moving house and fat pregnant fingers as my excuse. But I think we all agree that if I do that now, well.... an 8 month hiatus might seem short.

So just a short one to say, yes, I'm alive and in the new place, and no, I've not yet had Number 2. Though we are within 4 weeks of being due, so start those predictions rolling. Mine is for a 7lb boy on 11 July (so 2 weeks early). We've settled on names, and I must say that the male name is an absoulte corker that none of you would ever guess. And although I've always been partial to having a little girl, I've got to say that lately, I've swung to wanting a boy,- purely becuase I prefer that name. It's THAT good people (though i'm pretty sure conversations outside our earshot will question mine nad Dave's sobriety).

The house.... well.... it's amazing. I LOVED the Tabard Centre and know that it's probably the coolest place I will ever live - but this new house is a proper family home. And already life is so much easier and I feel so much happier. To wheel a pram in my front door (as opposed to going up 52 stairs) is a bliss i cant describe. To be within a 5 minute walk of every ammenity I shall ever need (train station, post office, supermarket, chemist, cinema, library, liesure centre with pool, a Primark....) is a revelation. For Fred to have his own bedroom and a wonderful backyard with lawn and sandpit to explore for hours on end.. is how a childhood is meant to be.

The actual moving into the house is a work in progress. We left a fair chunk of furniture at our old place (which we are renting out to a women's shoe designer) and much of what we have brought does not exactly fit in the smaller spaces of the new place. We are without some essentials (dining room table and chairs) and fixtures we took for granted in the last place (bathroom cabinets, bookshelves) will need to be sourced. So we are still some way off unpacking many boxes, and with baby number two beginning to take my full attention, I'm not too sure when this will happen. (perhaps when mama and papa anders get here in a couple of weeks! mwa ha ha).

Fred is marvellous. Each week gets better and better. He adds daily to his vocab and collection of bruises nad scratches. Last week, in an incident involving a potplant and a chair, he got his first (and I doubt last) black eye. It was an awesome sight to behold and one with I will exhibit when I locate the cord which connects my camera to the computer. He also has started properly cuddling me, which is just about the nicest thing I have ever experienced. It has taken Mr ActionMan 18 months to figure out that snuggling into mum for 10 minutes, with head on sholder going 'mmmmm, mmmmmm' is one of life's great pleasures. Although I'm not sure he's aware how hard it is for me to resist squeezing him too tight. Mmmmmm.

Moving Madness!

This weekend Dave and I are moving out of the Tabard Centre into our new place in Peckham (yes, THE Peckham from Only Fools and Horses and THE Peckham which 10 years ago had one of the worst crime rates in Europe... SE1 was becoming just too comfortable for us edgy types).

Anyway - as anyone who has ever moved will know, I'm in for a weekend of pain. God knows how we are going to do it, with me 33+ weeks pregnant and the size of a small elephant, a mini-monster who sits in the specific box you are packing at any one time - 'unpacking' it for you or cramming bits of apple into the holes, and poor Dave being responsible for all of the lifting. And whilst he does have huge guns - considering the number of stairs involved nad sheer quantity of books and wine (at the very least) to move - he too is in for a weekend of pain.

Anyway - will post pics of the move and the new place as soon as we are settled in properly. I'm off the email/internet for the next week and pretty busy organising all things new baby (new purchases, change in hospital and doctors etc. etc.) so realistically it will probably be at least a week.

Am very sad to be leaving this amazing apartment, have lots of memories of here - with many friends and family. It was Fred's first home.... *sigh* HOWEVER am most excited about moving to a place with no stairs nad a backyard with room for a sandpit. ANd we are renting out this place for the next year, so if Fred gets better at climbing stairs and we decide to rennovate into the loft, there is a vague (very vague) chance we might even move back here.

Anyway... BACK to packing!!! Argh.

Below are the pics of the Tabard Centre for all you people who were too lazy to come visit us in the last 3 years XXXX

(and yes, it was always this neat!)

Not just any Sheila.

We had some bad news over the weekend that came in the ominous form of missed phone calls from my sister at a time when she should have been in bed. My Nana Anders suffered a sudden and massive stroke from which she did not regain consciousness on Saturday morning. She passed away Monday evening.

You vaguely prepare yourself for things like this and in the event join the family rationalizing it’s inevitability, appreciating the swiftness, being grateful for the lack of pain or loss of mind.… trying to pull some sort of positivity out of something which is a deeply saddening event. It’s an end I think most of us would pick given a choice - but pragmatism aside, it’s quite obvious that nothing but time is going to stop how much it hurts that you will never again see some who has been such a big part of your life. Someone who you love very dearly. There was so much more to say, so much more to do and you can’t help but feel a little bit cheated.

But that’s the way the cookie crumbles, and I know I’ve been truly blessed to have an almost full deck of grandparents until 27. But in our tiny little Anders family, where christmases, birthdays, mothers days and idle Sundays have been shared by the same seven characters for over 15 years, she will be sorely and obviously missed. As will that gingernut biscuit cake she made.

No need for comments on this one, just to take a suggestion from me that you enjoy each day you have and to love your loved ones as best you can.

xxH

Aldeburgh, Suffolk

In a last minute flurry of activity we booked a small cottage in Suffolk for the long weekend just gone. And it was awesome. The town was cute, the cottage beyond our expectations, the sense of relaxation was just what we called for. The weather? Well. Pretty appalling actually. The first day was the text book example of an idyllic English summer day, but the two that followed were the more realistic illustrations. It rained and blew a gale non-stop. Which was unsurprising seeing as Dave and I are yet to go on a holiday together where the weather is not against us (seriously). But this poor weather was - in a way - a blessing as in my current sloth-like state, there is nothing more appealing to me than snuggling up in a cottage and watching movies. Dave braved taking Fred to the beach once or twice whilst I braved the comfiest bed I had ever slept in, a cup of tea and my book. We ventured out to the local shops where I wrestled with the touring nanas for a little wooden train set and had coffee and carrot cake in the cute local cafes. We had thought we would go out for dinner one night but the fabulousness of our cottage and the food we were able to source form the local shops made that seem the less appealing option. Below are a few photos (all taken on the nice day as we seemed to forget we had the camera the next two days).

Totally cute!!! 'Rosemary Cottage' was on the quiet main street about 50 yards down from the shops (with insufficient curtains, Fred was waking up at 6am each day - meaning that one unlucky parent was responsible for dashing this distance through the rain with Fred to retrieve coffee and croissants, whilst the other got a well deserved sleep-in.... The unlucky parent being me on both days, of course! The morning Dave got up with Fred, he was unable to function above pressing play on the dvd player... till the point he could no longer keep his eyes open and crawled back into bed after enduring baby einstein 'world animals' three times. Bless.)

Yummmy cafe/grocery store where we bought spinich and asparagus. And a hot chocolate. We came to the conclusion that the area surrounding Adelburgh must be the asparagus growing capital of the world as every second shop or farm had a sign hawking them. ANd dear god were they yummy!

Bookstore where Dave and Fred bought me a copy of 'The Black Prince' by Iris Murdoch... completely unaware that i was reading anothe rover her novels (the sea, the sea) in bed, at that moment!

In a town that boasted a number of fish and chip shops, this one just across the road from us was KING. At the alloted 'frying times' a line would form outside the shop, at least 30 people deep. Convinced they must do the greatest fishnchips known to man, Dave braved the weather to return home with parcels for the both of us one lunchtime.... Really shit chips. Nice fish.. if you avoided the greasiest batter ever created. We'll just put this one down to another example of the english being clueless.

Even comfier than it looks

Cutest (and best stocked) kitchen ever. I could have, and did, lick the counter-tops.

You know you are out of central London when you have a...backyard! And yes, the cricket was playing from the beautiful old radio on hte table there.

The other direction, looking towards the kitchen.

Another angle of the backyard... It's been a long time since we've had a patch of grass to release Fred onto.

Speaking of the monster - here he is! All edible and naked and ready for his bath.

The amount of water the splashed out of the sink during this awesomely fun bathtime soaked three handtowels!

Lucky I had an Arga (!!) to dry the towels next to. I've never cooked with one of these beasts before, and must admit to preferring the immediacy and certainty of gas/electric - but insofar as making the little kitchen toasty during those blustery days and heating the house all night long, it was awesome. Country living indeed.

Lamb from one of the local farms (in fact, all the meat and veg were local and we agreed by far a couple of the nicest dinners we've had in England) and rosemary... from the backyard (it's not called Rosemary Cottage for nothing people! THough they could have called it 'Rosemary and Lemon Thyme and Mint and Basil COttage, but doesn't quite have the same ring'

As you cna tell - LOVED this past weekend and getting the place for a rate cheaper than a hotel was an absolute find! Unfortunately it only had one bedroom and with Number Two due in July it's unlikely we will go there again :(

you can have 5 minutes of my time.

Well, just a short one, seeing as I'm in the midst of packing for a trip to the Suffolk coast (about 2-3 hour drive north-east of London) where Dave, Fred and I are going to be spending this long weekend. It was a last minute decision, booked yesterday and I'm pretty damn excited. So too must Dave be as here will be the first weekend in forever he will won't have to endure my complaints about how booooring our weekends are and how we only ever do the same same same stuff in London.

In fact, it's been a pretty amazing weekend so far as last night we went and saw Chris Rock (an american comedian) play to a packed O2 Arena and it was pretty awesome. I'd not been to that venue yet and never to see such a big stand-up comedy act. He was on for almost 2 hours, and after I got over the two Essex lasses sitting behind me hysterically laughing at EVERYTHING he said (wait for the punch line at least you twats), we had a really nice night. It was great - an excellent occasion for a fatty like me who would be unlikely to handle something like a concert.

In fact - after having not gone out in an evening since we had the wonderful Grandmas of Adelaide at our disposal - we seem to have had a flurry of social activity of late. As the previous weekend we went out to The Orrery, a Terence Conran restaurant on Marylebone High Street for Dave's birthday. It was no Fat Duck (not that anything ever could be), but it was a really nice night (especially my truffle risotto mmmmmm) and lovely to be spending time with just Dave which didn’t involve the mundane daily life questions such as whether I had remembered to buy the light bulbs today (NO. I'm cooking baby instead).

Anyway - must get back to packing seeing as Dave doesn’t know where the fridge is. I've started a few random blogs I hope to get up in the next week (yes, yes, there MIGHT be an Alien vs Predator review in there for you lot). In the meantime I will leave you with the latest photos of my baking frenzy. Last weekend I made Dave a Pavlova for his birthday... not that there was any left for him to eat.

in control of nothing.

Over 10 years ago I watched the movie Edward Scissorhands. And unlike every other girl my age, I absolutely hated it. Not because I didn’t emotionally connect with it - on the contrary - because I did so too much. And because my brain let me down. Somewhere up there, in the mass of grey, a bunch of cells forgot to send the word to another bunch of cells that the fact it was snowing meant that yes, Edward WAS alive, and that NO he had not killed himself as a result of the small town’s cruelty. So until a year or two back when Miss Verity insisted that we watch the film again (despite my screaming protests) I had lived with this misconception and was therefore immensely surprised to see that an obvious and key plot development in the final few moments had escaped my attention. And in fact the film is quite lovely (although it would have been better if the small-town, bigoted jock-boys had been thrown into jail or in the very least decapitated).

A similar thing has just happened to me.

I have just finished the What is the What by Dave Eggers – an author whose catalogue I have read most of, and a book I had asked for and received this past Christmas from Dave*. It is the story of Valentino Achak Deng, one of the ‘Lost Boys’ displaced by Sudan’s civil war during the 80s and 90s. I enjoyed the book immensely; it was page-turning and eye-opening. However prior to reading the novel I read a review in the Sunday Times about how the book’s real-life protagonist had died as a result of an assault whilst living in the USA, just after the book went to print. So it was with heavy heat that I soaked up his story. His triumphs and tribulations made all the more tragic by the tragic end to his life. Upon the book’s conclusion, I did my normal thing, and looked it up on the net, seeing what others had thought, reading interviews with the author etc. etc. And it was to my great surprise to learn that Valentino is still alive and kicking. Not murdered. Alive. Breathing. Doing amazing charity work. And I should have felt joyous at this news, but instead I felt cheated. And that maybe his story was a little less poignant… which is completely unfair as his journey and thoughts deserve nothing less than our full admiration.

So I blame my brain. It obviously is faulty and I’m making inquiries into trading it in for a better model.


*I am so terrible about buying or coveting books. If I’m within 100metres of a bookstore, I feel a huge gravitational pull that results in lost hours and piles of books I’m unlikely to read in the next year (3 for 2 Dave!! 3 for 2!!!!!). In fact, a while back Kym Kelly suggested that I do a blog entry on my (rather anally arranged) bookshelf. I thought about it for a few days but after statistically analyzing the percentage of books I had actually read, decided that some serious reading needed to be done before that blog entry saw the light of day. As their ain't nothing impressive about a bookshelf that only… say… 55% of the content has actually had its’ spine cracked. I mean, one could conclude that I only have Vickram Seth’s A Suitable Boy on there solely to impress, I mean HAHAHA… HA.. who would… do.. mmmm… ha?

And while I’m talking about cows, I just thought I would relay an interesting insight into ME. Grand Designs is one of the very few shows which Dave and I will both agree to watch (the apprentice and jonathan ross being the ONLY other two) and whilst Dave quietly enjoys the infinity pools and sleek climate-controlled cellars, I normally find myself choking on my earl gray over the amazing libraries then collapsing into a kicking and screaming heap on the floor informing Dave that I WANT ONE.

Oh – have I mentioned that I have been baking of late? (Having never baked anything in my life before). See the sponge cake below. In you FACE, Nigella.

fred being ever so 'helpful'

a big thank you to beth (and her boobs) for whipping that cream.

yep, it's clean.

cooling rack? BANG!!

lesson : baking paper = not edible.

it tasted as good as it looked.

knife not really necessary seeing as I ate the whole thing in one sitting

mmmmmmm.

mum, you are the best most domestic baking goddess ever in the history of the universe.

married to the sea

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